How long does your luck hold against dozens of rattlesnakes?

In a special show of stupid, a man nicknamed “The Texas Snake Man” has set a new (stupid) world record by sitting in a bathtub with 87 rattlesnakes. Real, live, fanged, venomous rattlesnakes.

Another day, another bizarre world record for Jackie Bibby, “The Texas Snake Man.” Bibby spent about 45 minutes in a see-through bathtub with 87 rattlesnakes Monday, shattering his own record by 12 snakes just in time for Guinness World Records Day, which is Thursday. The record was certified by a Guinness official.

. . .

The record was Bibby’s latest grab at glory. Last year he set a Guinness-certified record by holding 10 rattlesnakes by their tails in his mouth at once. He said he plans to break that record Tuesday by squeezing in an 11th.

I don’t mean this as an insensitive comment, but he might do well to ask Steve Irwin (nee The Crocodile Hunter) a bit about how long you can go around dangerous animals before your luck fails.

The article discusses other official and unofficial records held by Bibby, so head over to get the full scoop if you want to see how far someone can press their luck.

[tags]The Texas Snake Man, Rattlesnakes, Snakes – why did it have to be snakes?, World record[/tags]

Genital piercing to protect virtue?

On one side of the story, we have the daughter who claims her genitals were forcibly pierced by her mother to “make it uncomfortable to have sex.” The mother says the girl agreed to the piercing to help rebuild trust.

Prosecutor Steve Maresca said the mother called on a friend to shave the girl’s head and do the piercing after realizing that she had been having sex, including with the mother’s boyfriend.

Wait a minute. I think I see the real problem here. All this over a boyfriend? Clearly the daughter is a dirty little whorish Lolita, trying to steal the love-toy away from frigid and impersonal mama. Mama should just say “No” to the boyfriend a little less often and he’ll be less tempted by the younger tramp. That, or just get her in bed for an especially nasty threesome.

As a bonus, I caught this advertisement with the story, which has the headline “Girl: Mom forced genitalia piercing”

piercing-could-happen-to-you

And I know it can happen – I just hope forced genital piercing doesn’t happen all that often. I couldn’t help but laugh at the close proximity of the ad and headline.

[tags]Genitalia, Forced piercing, Dirty little whore, Frigid, Lolita, It could happen[/tags]

Stupid people doing stupid things

I’m certainly no fan of President Bush and his war-work, but really, can’t we do something to get rid of the folks who go overboard like this? (absolutely NSFW Let’s go ahead and start with folks like this:

zombie_ny-wtc-hater.jpg

I can understand some of the sentiments expressed by protestors in some of the photos, but very few and I don’t think the excessive stances help anything.

And my goodness, why can’t we have more hot chicks at the nude and topless protests instead of the androgynous freaks seen in almost all those photos?

[tags]Overboard, Overreacting, Me thinks thou dost protest too much[/tags]

Off-duty sheriff’s deputy goes on shooting spree at a private home

This is just freaky news:

An off-duty sheriff’s deputy went on a shooting rampage early Sunday at a home where seven young people had gathered for pizza and movies, killing six and critically injuring the other before authorities fatally shot him, officials said.

. . .

The circumstances of the shooting were hazy Sunday and it wasn’t immediately clear what the gunman’s motive was, but the mother of a 14-year-old victim said the suspect may have been a jealous boyfriend. The shooting occurred in a white, two-story duplex about a block from downtown Crandon.

The shooter in question is 20 years old, and apparently touched in the head (and not in the good way).

[tags]WTF, Shooting spree, Touched in the head[/tags]

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If you love your children, you’ll get them proper protection

As a full-fledged member of the tinfoil hat self-protection society (note: I am not aware of an actual society with this name, merely making something up to promote the effectiveness of this post), I realize the importance of protecting not only my own brain from s00000per-sekrit thought-penetrating waves, but also that of my unborn child (note: I am not actually capable of carrying my unborn child, nor am I aware of any unborn children I might have in the future that would currently need protection).  While I can (and most certainly do) wear a tinfoil hat for my own protection, I’ve always wondered what I could do to protect my child properly.  Now, thanks to the brilliant minds at MummyWraps, I have a way to prevent my child’s corruption from evil-doers who would seek to infiltrate his thoughts with bad things.

From conception to birth, your baby undergoes the most rapid growth of its life, with incredibly fast cell-division taking your precious one from a single fertilised ovum to a beautiful baby in just 9 short months. However, such incredibly rapid growth also carries with it great risk of cell mutations that could cause major medical problems or even miscarriage.

Electro-Smog, or Electro-Magnetic Radiation (EMR) as it is more commonly known, is a complex and pervasive energy field radiating from both natural sources and from man-made electrical and electronic systems. EMR sources include cosmic rays, x-rays, radar, microwaves, TV and radio stations, cellphones, and all other wireless communication systems. International research has shown that prolonged exposure to EMR can be detrimental to human health, particularly that of unborn children.

Oh.  Well.  So they say they are protecting from stray electric and magnetic pollution.  I still think it’s a front for s000per-sekrit thought penetration electro-waves brain penetration protection.  And for $70, you can’t pass up that kind of safety.  (via Futurismic)

[tags]Tin-foil, s00per-sekrit, tinfoil hat, Brain protection, Thought waves[/tags]

Men – hide your stash of pr0n better than this guy

Pr0n! One of the driving factors in the growth of the intarpipes, I am certain. Fantasy get-away for many men. For one man, however, it was only a sure-fire method to peeve the old-lady and suffer a serious hurting.

A Chicago woman who became enraged after discovering her longtime boyfriend’s stash of pornography shot and killed him in their South Side home over the weekend, prosecutors said.

. . .

Strowder and Martin had lived together in the 5300 block of South Shields Avenue for the last two years, prosecutors said at a hearing Tuesday at which Strowder was ordered held in lieu of $600,000 bail. On Sunday night, Strowder found CDs inside the home containing images of nude women and lost control, authorities said.

Ding-dang-diggity! That’s some freaky scary stuff, right men?

[tags]Pr0n for disaster[/tags]

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Freaky news of the day – surrogate births her own twin grandchildren

So when the woman who carried you 9 months in the womb and birthed you is also your grandmother, would you call her Mom or Grandma? That’s the question these Brazilian twins will have to figure out when they are old enough to talk.

Rosinete Palmeira Serrao, a government health worker, gave birth to twin boys by Caesarean section on Thursday at the Santa Joana Hospital in the city of Recife, the hospital said in a statement on its Web site.

. . .

Serrao decided to serve as a surrogate mother after four years of failed attempts at pregnancy by her 27-year-old daughter, Claudia Michelle de Brito.

Kudos for going above and beyond normal parental responsibilities in helping your child have children of her own, but man if those kids were American, I could foresee them needing counseling as teens. I’m sure it shouldn’t seem weird, but yet I think it is weird. It’s no Ray Stevens’ tune, but it’s pretty close.

[tags]Mom is my grandma, Grandma is my mom, Brazilian woman gives birth to own grandchildren[/tags]

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Scary image – chair leg through eye-socket and into throat

It’s all fun and games until somebody loses an eye, right? Well, for this happy-go-lucky club hopper, apparently things are still all fun and games.

bb_chair-through-eye-x_ray.jpgTHESE X-ray images show the leg of a chair embedded into the eye socket of a Melbourne teenager who miraculously survived a random attack outside a city nightclub earlier this year.

The images of teenager Shafique el-Fahkri at the Royal Melbourne Hospital were taken as a team of five surgeons prepared for the complex three-hour operation that would save his life and his eye.

After leaving intensive care, Mr Fahkri spent a month in hospital and today has 95 per cent of his sight back.

Yes, you read that right. He took a chair leg through his eye socket and down into his throat, yet didn’t lose the eye and has nearly recovered full vision back. Amazingly, the victim claims to bear no ill-will towards his attacker, and seems to not be helping police in charges against the aggressor. (via boingboing)

[tags]All fun and games, A chair through the eye, X-Ray shows chair leg through eye[/tags]

The story of the travelling nukes

I remember reading about the recent slip in which half a dozen missiles with nuclear warheads were flown from North Dakota to Louisiana before being discovered. I didn’t say anything about it back then because there really wasn’t a lot of good information on it, and I figured most visitors would miss it if I just posted as an aside (that mini posting box on the right hand side of the Blahg). Now, the Washington Post has a very nice story up about what happened, and I figure pointing out the article for those that want to read about it now would be reasonable.

Just after 9 a.m. on Aug. 29, a group of U.S. airmen entered a sod-covered bunker on North Dakota‘s Minot Air Force Base with orders to collect a set of unarmed cruise missiles bound for a weapons graveyard. They quickly pulled out a dozen cylinders, all of which appeared identical from a cursory glance, and hauled them along Bomber Boulevard to a waiting B-52 bomber.

The airmen attached the gray missiles to the plane’s wings, six on each side. After eyeballing the missiles on the right side, a flight officer signed a manifest that listed a dozen unarmed AGM-129 missiles. The officer did not notice that the six on the left contained nuclear warheads, each with the destructive power of up to 10 Hiroshima bombs.

. . .

A simple error in a missile storage room led to missteps at every turn, as ground crews failed to notice the warheads, and as security teams and flight crew members failed to provide adequate oversight and check the cargo thoroughly. An elaborate nuclear safeguard system, nurtured during the Cold War and infused with rigorous accounting and command procedures, was utterly debased, the investigation’s early results show.

. . .

A former Air Force senior master sergeant wrote separately that “mistakes were made at the lowest level of supervision and this snowballed into the one of the biggest mistakes in USAF history. I am still scratching my head wondering how this could [have] happened.”

A recounting of the oversights and skipped protocols that let this roll into such a problem are well covered in the story. Having worked in an environment where classified material was handled, and having seen the safeguards in place, it’s always interesting to me to hear about breakdowns in procedures. This particular incident was a little more interesting because the mistakes happened, I think in part, when people who were not expecting to be handling abnormal goods didn’t follow the necessary steps involved when abnormal materials work was occurring.

By skipping the safety protocols because this was viewed as a normal (i.e. non-nuclear) goods transfer, a real problem developed. That was why we were always instructed to always, always, always follow procedures as if we were dealing with classified information. That prevents accidental information leaks and reduces the probability of missing a step in proper handling of classified information.

[tags]Nuclear materials, Broken Arrow?, Bent spear, Mishandling nuclear warheads[/tags]

Crazy news items

Just a handful of news items (some old but still interesting) that might make you ask WTF?

  • A special kind of stupid – drug dealer style:

    Federal agents thought there was something fishy about Leroy Carr. On four occasions since last December, Carr either crossed the Canadian border or was found near it with thousands of dollars in cash, according to a complaint filed in U.S. District Court. He also sometimes carried night vision goggles and a GPS device programmed with coordinates for a well-known drug-smuggling trail.

    But Carr refused to speak with Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents, and they let him go – until he called to ask if they had seen his cocaine.

  • A southern-style ass-kicking sans arms:

    Police are investigating the death of a man who collapsed after he was head-butted by an armless man in a fight over a woman.

  • An apparent question of insufficient medical expertise and examination:

    A Venezuelan man who had been declared dead woke up in the morgue in excruciating pain after medical examiners began their autopsy.

  • Cookies design to make your breasts grow:

    Ladies, are you self-conscious about your breasts? Do you think they need to be bigger to get you attention from guys, or at least from guys like Charlie White? Well, you could have expensive and gross breast implant surgery, or you could just grab some F Cup cookies from Japan. These sure-to-be-effective cookies apparently make your breasts bigger when you eat just two a day, while most cookies will just make your ass bigger. See a close-up of the box after the jump.

  • Emotional trauma from not winning the lottery? Try actually buying a ticket, dumb-ass:

    A Dutch woman who claimed she suffered emotional damages due to not winning the lottery missed the jackpot in court too.

    Amsterdam District Court judges Wednesday rejected the claim of Helene de Gier, who said she was traumatized by not winning the country’s National Postcode Lottery, which she didn’t enter, while her neighbors did.

  • One of the worst dog bites you can suffer – at least, if you are extra stupid:

    A naked man was bit in the genitals by a police dog while being arrested for running nude and entering homes in a Minneapolis neighborhood.

    . . .

    While the officer was ordering the suspect out of the house, the suspect began hitting him, police said.

    The dog, which was still leashed, bit the suspect to protect the officer.

And honestly, this is the kind of posting that could be put together every day, and with a greater number of entries, and we’d still only see a handful of the stupids that we suffer through in this country.

[tags]Stupid, WTF, Crazy news[/tags]